Also see: Dancing with the Stars Podcast

Set your season pass and get your Bruno translator ready because on March 21st,  Season 12  of Dancing With The Stars will Argentine Tango it’s way back into your living room with what they’re calling their most (insert adjective for amazing) cast yet. Yeah we’ve heard it before and the Season 12 cast does not disappoint in delivering all the usual loosest definitions of the word “star.” So who do we have battling it out for the prestigiously tacky Mirror Ball trophy?

This season’s sex tape star is Kendra Wilkinson, a former playmate, who is now a wife and mother with her own reality show.  And if you’ve ever seen Kendra’s show, or every episode like I have, you know you have no social life, but also that she’s funny, even if it’s unintentional. She has a laid back quality that I’m guessing will mesh well with her partner Louie Van Amstel, and that combined with her ability to work a stripper pole should keep her around at least past the first elimination.

Season 12’s token supermodel is Petra Nemcova. The supermodel’s plight on DWTS has never been easy. Although their lean bodies and mile long legs look beautiful spray tanned and wrapped in glitter, more times than not, they’re extremely wooden and give lifeless performances. Please surprise us Petra.

Chelsea Kane is this season’s Disney girl, and although you have no idea who she is, you have to remember that hell hath no fury like a Disney star wanting her chance in the spotlight.  We all saw it first with the Cheetah Girl in season 5 and then especially after Kyle Massey’s charming and surprisingly agile performance last season; you just can’t underestimate a person who has been performing from the womb. And to Chelsea’s advantage she’s partnered with Mark Ballas, who despite putting Bristol Palin in a gorilla suit last season, is arguably one of the best pros, and knows how to take home the trophy.

Wendy Williams and Kirstie Alley will most likely be the “comic” relief this season. Get ready to hear talk show host Wendy Williams ask the judges countless times “How you doin?” and then Bruno’s incoherent responses will follow and still somehow make me uncomfortable.  Wendy is paired with Tony Dovolani and I think they will be fun to watch. After seeing Tony suffer through a two-month abusive tirade by Kate Gosselin, in Season 10, the producers gave him the gift of Audrina Patridge last season, and although she had the personality of a dishrag, it was a pretty dishrag that danced surprisingly well.  I don’t think Wendy will be that good, but she’ll bring the personality and will probably work a Slim Jim into one of her performances.  I am thinking a tango sans rose, plus a Slim Jim.

Same goes for Kirstie Alley, not the Slim Jim, although I wouldn’t rule out food as a prop.  I can’t imagine the actress turned Jenny Craig spokesperson will be much on the dance floor technically, but she knows how to put on a show. She’s on the cover of TV Guide telling the world “I Want to Win,” but I think the most entertaining thing about Kirstie will be her bickering with pro Maksim Chmerkovskiy. Max, the “bad boy of the ballroom,” wears a “Deep V” like no other, and doesn’t take any backtalk, which is what we can expect from Kirstie.

Now let’s turn it over to the guys. If Jennifer Grey was America’s sweetheart last season, despite her endless complaining, then in Season 12 the Karate Kid is back to take her place. Ralph Macchio is here to remind everyone who the real Karate Kid is, yeah you heard me Jaden Smith.  Ralph has the nostalgia factor working for him and I think that will make him the crowd favorite. Expect to see a karate inspired Paso Doble, “The Crane” anyone?  Also I think Ralph is in good hands with pro Karina Smirnoff, especially with how she handled her “Situation” last season, literally.

Rapper Romeo has ditched the “Lil” and is back after withdrawing from Season 2 due to injury. You all remember his father, entertainment mogul Master P, stepped in and that might have been the only step he got right.  For Romeo’s sake let’s just hope the only thing he gets from his dad is his ability to rap and unlike his father he can put that word-based musicality into motion.

Also “known” for his words is radio DJ Mike Catherwood, aka “Psycho Mike.”  This is the “wait… who?” cast member of Season 12. And unless he can “wow” the audience with his personality and dancing, let’s hope for him and his partner Lacey Schwimmer’s sake, all those people that call into the radio, call and vote for him. Otherwise it’s likely he’ll be the first to go, unless of course we have another “Hasselhoff Shocker.”

This brings us to the athletes. I expect WWE champion Chris Jericho to bring the drama he brings to the ring, to the ballroom.  I don’t see why there can’t be a ladder dance? If there’s one thing professional wrestlers know about, besides shaving off their body hair, its choreography. And I think with powerhouse pro Cheryl Burke as his partner he could have a shot at making it far, and not to mention he’s already used to wearing a costume with flare.

Also coming form the ring to the ballroom is boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard. Clearly Sugar Ray has athleticism that can only propel you in this competition. At 54 he’s the eldest of the guys, but with pro Anna Trebunskaya by his side I think he still has the potential to go far in the competition.  And same goes for Pittsburg Steeler’s wide receiver, Hines Ward, who is partnered with pro Kym Johnson. When Emmitt Smith took the trophy home in Season 3 we learned football players shouldn’t be underestimated.

One thing that I think makes this season interesting and different from the past two is it’s missing the clear front-runner. The last two seasons Nicole Scherzinger and Jennifer Grey won, and we knew they would by week 2.  In earlier seasons there was Donny Osmond, Drew Lachey, Kristi Yamaguchi, and Olympian Shawn Johnson. We all expected them to do well because they all at one point in their careers relied on musicality and choreography, even if they were in the back of the boy band; I’m talking to you Joey Fatone. The only possible frontrunners could be the athletes. A lady took home the last 2 trophies and I think the guys have a chance this season. But you never know when a Bristol Palin might sneak in.