Kendra’s nanny Victoria is getting ready to go on her blind date and Kendra’s best advice is, “Don’t go for any look, the only look you go for is the penis size.” Even Kendra’s friend Brittany, who must have asked for “The Lisa Rinna” when she got her lips done, says, “That is the worst advice I’ve ever heard. What if he’s a nice guy and he has a little penis.” Then Kendra and Victoria say they wouldn’t date guys with small penises and Brittany would and why I now know this is a mystery.

Hank is still in New York trying to work on his “post NFL career.” He has “this whole meeting thing” down to a science and explains how all meetings are the same: First you shake hands, and then learn each other’s names, and then you finally sit down. OMG thanks so much Hank for explaining what a meeting is.

Kendra and the girls (Victoria and Brittany) are “exercising” in the backyard and Victoria wants to get her confidence back after the divorce. Kendra goes on to explain the benefits of working out, saying “ it brings you back to life. Your blood flows to the right places, you get hornier, and it’s good for you, good for the guy, and good for the vagina.” Then Kendra takes out a shake weight.

Kendra brings Victoria to get pampered for her first date and while they’re getting their nails done, Victoria talks about how hard it is to find someone in her age range. Kendra says that before Hank her age range for guys was 80 and up. Oh we know Kendra.

Hank’s agent sets up a “private meeting” with a jeweler because he wants to buy something special for Kendra. He decides on yellow diamond earrings that are really expensive but also kind of look like an 85-year-old grandma would wear them. Perfect if Kendra was still dating Hef.

Victoria gets ready for her date, which includes professional hair, make-up and a spray tan in a pop-up tent. She’s really nervous and when the doorbell rings, Kendra sends her to hide in the kitchen. Mystery guy (aka Sean) comes to the door and he has a goatee and his sunglasses propped up on his head. Strike one (two if you count each). Kendra pretends to be the strict father and asks Sean if he’s a good guy. He says yes and she tells him if he isn’t, she’ll hunt him down…and ask how big his penis is.

Sean and Victoria are in the car and you can hear crickets until Victoria randomly asks what kind of movies he likes. He responds with “gladiator movies, with big strong men and short leather skirts.” But he’s just kidding! Another pleasant surprise is the full sleeve of tattoos peaking out from under his shirt. That’s strikes three and four (I’m counting two for the entrance).

At the restaurant, it’s still awkward, as Sean wipes sweat from his face and Victoria refuses to talk about her tattoo. It doesn’t get much better when Sean tells her he has four kids and all she says is “wow.” Sean says, “All the same Dad,” and apparently this makes Victoria laugh and really turns the date around. Sean tells her she “looks stunning” and Victoria can tell, “He’s a good-hearted person.” They both decide they want to “do this again,” and that means Kendra better book that “glam squad” to get her ready.

Hank is back in LA and Kendra “is proud of him for doing what he did in NY.” What exactly did he do? Oh yeah handshakes and introductions. Suddenly baby Hank runs a box over to Kendra in the most adorable way possible. It’s the diamond earrings, which Hank had made into clip-ons because she doesn’t have pierced ears. Now they’re really fit for a grandma.

Then in this week’s suggestive ending, Kendra asks, “Where am I going to wear these earrings?” Hank says she’ll find some place and she responds with, “I’ll wear them tonight, in bed.” Roll credits!

Next week Kendra helps her brother with some appearances in San Diego and settles some issues with her mom.