It’s eight degrees and snowing in Chicago. The gang all handle this differently: Alex, Dave, and Penny play indoor baseball in Dave’s apartment; Max gets depressed and spends the entire episode as a hibernating bear; and conditions are perfect for Brad and Jane’s annual fight.

Brad and Jane join the gang (minus Max the Bear) and the Spring Smackdown seems to be in full swing when Jane finds secret Facebook messages between Brad and an ex-girlfriend. Dave and Penny are so happy, but it turns out to be fake. Brad and Jane take it outside and though it looks real, it is really just them yelling about how much they love each other. It is also proof that I will watch Eliza Coupe and Damon Wayans, Jr. do anything and still laugh.

Unaware of the fakeness of the fight, Dave has had special “Team Brad” and “Team Jane” t-shirts made. Apparently the reason why these guys love Spring Smackdown so much is that Brad works through his anger by buying treating at the Chop House (steaks all around!) and Jane stays lets Penny give her advice about guys, making her feel like not such a mess for once. This post Smackdown “douche week” is also the only thing that can break Max out of hibernation.

Jane shows up at Penny’s with some luggage. Penny has donned her girl talk, flowy pants and good lord they look comfy. Penny also uses a phrase I find it difficult to believe I have never said to myself: “let’s get you out of these feelings and into some Brie.” Heaven. But Jane doesn’t seem into it. What she is into is Alex’s suggestion that they watch the “Criterion Collection of Clueless” and a slumber party. Penny worried about being left out. The guy version of this is that Brad wants to “rage get caught up on Downton Abbey” not “rage spend all his money.” Goodness. Brad might be the perfect husband and my new life goal might be to find one of my own. He is kind of enjoying Max’s bear state and I am too.

Clearly Spring Smackdown isn’t working and Dave and Penny don’t know why. Alex sits up and announces it’s the “butterfly effect,” but she just means the movie, which has come on TV. In an awfully perceptive moment for the gang’s little bird, she does also know that them forcing the fight is causing ripple effects.

Back at home, Brad and Jane love fake fighting and the sneaking around. They adorably giggle and kiss their way back into their apartment to find it freezing. Someone left the terrace door open, letting the snowstorm, and a pigeon, in. Since Brad’s a “bird magnet” it must be his fault. And now Spring Smackdown is on for reals.

Jane runs to Penny for help and finds herself having to admit the fake fight. Penny goes to Dave, and they agree that they don’t even want to help them now. Alex convinces them to help out anyway or “spring won’t come.” All it takes is a quick analogy about putting the still left open doors back together and Brad and Jane are their kissy selves again, which leaves only Max still in trouble. Time to de-bear him. They tell him it’s time for Brad to take everyone to the Chop House and this bear is pumped about free steak. Following steaks, spring has come and Max is clean shaven. All is right with the gang once again.

Next week: Steak Me Home Tonight gets a liquor license and the gang gets sex dreams.

In Other News:

  • Brad gets “bro-zillians” and spit laughs.
  • Alex does a great impression of both Renee Zellweger and chipmunks
  • Dave has a calf length leather duster and it looks just as creepy as you think.
  • Jane polishes her fax machine. Not a euphemism.
  • To Alex, the butterfly effect is “that one movie leading to Ashton Kutcher doing a lot of bad movies.” Won’t get an argument from me.
  • Jane and Alex have a secret sister language.
  • Dave says “pic-i-nic.”
  • Brad’s cologne has traces of nightcrawlers. Ick.