My DVR has once again decided it hates me and takes away the pause and rewind button, so I had to get everything done on the fly, with only one pass.  Good thing the Kardashians aren’t too hard to “keep up with.” The only downside is that It’s Big ‘O’ Week and when Oprah’s on anything – a show, a magazine, a book club, though not a network – it makes things worth watching.

But first, Kanye’s stylist is giving Kim a “full clothing makeover” because that’s normal.  Kim’s style is just “evolving and changing” and she’s “excited to collaborate with him and see his take on fashion.”  If you had talent Kim you would be collaborating on a song, instead of a “closet makeover.”   So if Kim agrees to donate her entire closet he will “fill it with all of the dopest sh*t.”  When my style “evolves,” it means I went a little too crazy at Ross Dress For Less.

In a hilarious twist, Rob is judging the Miss USA pageant in Las Vegas and Kim is also whoring herself out in Vegas for her new fragrance.  The end result is Rob and Kim get into a fight because “everything is about Kim.”

The red carpet is no different and each question Rob answers is about one of his sisters.  Then Arsenio Hall and the Bachelorette from 8 seasons ago, complement him on his sock line so he feels better. Yikes.

At Jenner Communications “the girls” are having a business meeting about their new make up line and Kim, who is on a “classy makeover” kick, is against everything Kourtney and Khloe want.  Kim doesn’t want “Kardashian” in the name of the makeup line and as Khloe points out, “That name got you pretty far so you shouldn’t knock it.”

Oprah wants to do an interview with just Kim and of course Kim is really into it because she likes “doing things alone.”  This hurts Kourtney’s feelings.  Meanwhile Rob is blabbing about how he has “no income.”  Rob, that’s because you don’t do anything.

Oprah finally arrives and basically everything they show is exactly what you saw on Oprah’s final chapter, and I know you watched it so I’m not going to bother repeating it.  The only development is that Rob feels left out.

Kim wants to do her own lingerie line in the Philippines and Khloe and Kourtney are against it because they think, “it’s rewarding” to do everything together.  Khloe asks, “Do you think we’re a charity case that you give back to?” Kim lies and says, “Absolutely not.”

Khloe wants to have a “family therapy” session with a mediator. Kim and Kris are against it but they go anyway to make everyone else happy.  Irony: they’re the two that need the most therapy.

Family therapy commences and Kim isn’t into it. Everyone points out that Kris favors Kim and Kris thinks they are “just taking it personally” and that “she’s too busy.”  Khloe wants her mom’s approval more than Kourtney, but Kris admits that she “needs to stop and tell them all how proud she is of them.”

Rob’s turn and the therapist points out that “everyone talks for him and about him.”  Rob breaks down into tears because he’s “frustrated and sad,” and he leaves the room sobbing.  Then Kourtney starts to cry because she’s pregnant and Kim and Kris sit there like slabs of stone.  The therapist leaves to go find him and it’s a TO BE CONTINUED… again.

Next week the drama continues with more therapy and offensive emails.