Danny gives a scathing confession to his priest, admitting to his premarital affairs with Mindy, which apparently sends Father Francis into cardiac arrest, and his grave. He and Mindy attend the funeral, where they meet Father Michael O’Donnell (Stephen Colbert), the replacement priest with a wild past. Danny’s relieved at first, and thinks that the Father will go easy on him, but it turns out that O’Donnell offers no forgiveness when it comes to things like knocking up your Indian girlfriend.

So Danny lies to the Father, telling him that he and Mindy are keeping things kosher. He asks his mother for advice, and she tells him that she’s forgiven him. She suggests that he doesn’t worry so much about what the priest thinks, and focus on his own feelings of guilt, and why they’re bothering him so much.

Meanwhile, Mindy is worried that she didn’t make a good first impression on the Father. She turns to Jeremy – who is busy rehearsing for a one-man show that bears a striking resemblance to An American Tail – who suggests that she take matters into her own hands. But when she invites him over for a meal, she learns that Danny has told the priest that she’s Catholic.

At dinner, Mindy attempts to impress Father O’Donnell with bibles verses, which she is receiving via text messages from Morgan. Unfortunately, Morgan’s pulling double duty, trying to help Mindy with scripture and Jeremy with lines as he attempts to put on his play. He bails on Jeremy in order to aid Mindy, at which time he causes a fire that sets off the sprinklers in the theater, ruining Jeremy’s show.

Mindy is fending quite nicely for herself, and Danny is impressed with how well she’s fooling Father O’Donnell. But when the priest heads for the bathroom, Mindy panics, realizing that he discover the condoms hidden in their medicine cabinet. So she sneaks in while he’s peeing and removes them.

The pair think that they’ve made it through the night safely, but the Father insists on staying and playing some Scrabble with them. While they play, Father O’Donnell mentions that he’d heard Danny was dating a sex-crazed girl, which Danny passes off as merely an ex, whom he would never marry. This causes Mindy to assume that he means he’s not interested in marrying her, so she goes to bed, and Danny arranges a ride home for their guest.

Father O’Donnell sees Danny’s screensaver of their baby’s sonogram on his laptop, and asks about it. Danny comes clean about everything, and the priest threatens to excommunicate him. But Mindy saves the day, proclaiming that she wants to have their child baptized. Father O’Donnell agrees that Danny can come to confession, and Mindy prepares for a lifetime of the Catholic church.

Choice lines:
“Who says he’s getting baptized? I kinda wanna raise him Jewish so I can get ahead in life.” – Mindy, about her unborn son.
“I’m used to calling you ‘The Virginity Thief of Staten Island.'” – Danny, to Father O’Donnell.
“I mean, that’s why I think the Bible’s on fleek.” – Mindy